You were that one person i thought i could trust. We talked alot and i thought i knew you. i thought you were the big brother i've always wanted. but you really turned out to be a jerk. i respected you so much and even told pplz how understanding and great you were. but now i realize what people told me about you, that i tried to block out, were true. you hurt me and yet i still stood by your side rooting for you. but each time you threw me down but i got up myself hoping for the best. you never knew and you will never know because everything ends here. hope you have a good life, and even tho i may miss you i will just turn away because now i know you haven't changed like you said, you're exactly the same. i won't be rooting for you anymore, because i don' tknow you anymore.
bye stranger.

so i was walking on the path of yesterdays~~ puhaha wth??

So i've been reading past entries once again on my xangas and i've had this one since middle school. It is amazing how much things changed since then: my thoughts, my life, my experiences, especially my friends. It does allow me to miss some things, while others i rather leave behind. Seriously i was so wierd now that i think about it... i had no fear... i didn't care what people thought and i spoke with my mind and my heart. but now i hold back on alot of things, maybe due to experiences and struggles but i guess you realize as you grow up not everything is so easy and you must think before you leap. i mean i still don't care what people think but i feel more limited than before to speak especially the feelings and words screaming from my heart

i've always been quiet, but now a days i feel even worse... of course those of you who do know me well i can get pretty crazy but i am actually quite quiet with new pplz... its not like i want to be... just shy and i don't know what to say... hmmm AWKWARDD... but of course it takes time to get used to and get ot know each other... i don't even know what im rambling about and yea idk why im on xanga again... i guess its a public diary of somesort... or private since barely anyone goes on this anymore... but yea xanga was pretty awesome back then. myspace i still think is weird... and facebook only gets wierder... and now TWITTER?? i have one but i don' t know how to use it hahaha and it seems boring... just a bunch of statuses... *shrugs (if ya want to follow me, my ID is wackyXpaky ... i think)

anywhoo korea is interesting... thas all i can say LOL alot of new experiences and alot of growing up =p

MY GOODNESS!! i read my old xangas...

i had no fear and i was definattley on crack xDDDD

... yet my hearts still races

do you know the feeling of so much pain that tears don't even come out...

i do now...

because

i chased something i couldn't have...

but now i cry deep inside, but i smile for the memories

why did you have to come into my life

i see no purpose for it

all i feel is pain when you're around

i don't want to chase for something i can't have

but my heart still races =(